A Sense of En-title-ment
I always get a kick out of perusing creative porn titles. Now that the 2006 AVN Awards nominee list is out, let’s see what DVD and video monikers we can make fun of today...
Bad News Bitches : Now that’s what I call a title. It’s short, it’s blatant and direct (some women might even consider it insulting), it’s something that piques your interest as a man, and - last but not least - it’s a good play on words (you’ve heard of the mainstream flick Bad News Bears, right?).
Straight A Students: The first time I saw this title it cracked me up, because I knew immediately what they meant without having to read the synopsis of the DVD. And it’s a catchy title because:
A (pun intended). It tells us right up front yet in a leering, rib-nudging manner what the participants are all about (anal sex);
B. How quick and eager they are to do those acts (straight away, immediately); and
C. It tells us it’s about coed, possibly teen girls, which is - need I say - a big draw.
My Ass is Haunted: Where do I begin with this title? First of all, if your ass truly is haunted, you really ought to have that looked into (teehee). So who do you call? A ghostbuster, an assbuster, or maybe both?
And how big does your ass have to be to be inhabited by dead spirits? In looking at the credits I see that my girl Katja Kassin is in the picture...Oh, that big...
War of the Girls: Another clever spin on a non-adult production title. This DVD is not to be confused with the Tom Cruise summer-blockbusted (yes, I said that right) War of the Worlds. I sure hope the porn DVD had relatively more success that the mainstream feature.
Semen Demons: It has a nice ring to it, it rolls right off the tongue (I would imagine that that probably is a play on words even though I personally haven’t seen the video), and it’s just fun to say over and over. Besides it’s short and to the point and everyone knows what the theme is about (cumshots) without it being explicitly said. And you sort of get the feeling that the theme is an obsession. Similarly, see Cheek Freaks (where it’s all about the ass).
Short quiz: Can you guess , specifically, the theme or porn niche of the following DVDs based solely on their titles (without searching an online adult DVD retailer site, or googling the phrases, or otherwise cheating :)) ?
Anal Retentive
Mouth 2 Mouth 2
Glazed & Confused 4
Innocence: Perfect Pink
Re-Penetrator
Big Toys No Boys
Last but not least, in terms of new titles we have the soon-to-be-released Black Girls Wanna Cracker, where ebony women play dominant roles to white guys‘ submissive ones. That’s a classic title if there ever was one. Let’s face it, the porn industry has never been nor will ever be known for its political-correctness. And you thought Sierra Has A Negro Problem was bad...
Bad News Bitches : Now that’s what I call a title. It’s short, it’s blatant and direct (some women might even consider it insulting), it’s something that piques your interest as a man, and - last but not least - it’s a good play on words (you’ve heard of the mainstream flick Bad News Bears, right?).
Straight A Students: The first time I saw this title it cracked me up, because I knew immediately what they meant without having to read the synopsis of the DVD. And it’s a catchy title because:
A (pun intended). It tells us right up front yet in a leering, rib-nudging manner what the participants are all about (anal sex);
B. How quick and eager they are to do those acts (straight away, immediately); and
C. It tells us it’s about coed, possibly teen girls, which is - need I say - a big draw.
My Ass is Haunted: Where do I begin with this title? First of all, if your ass truly is haunted, you really ought to have that looked into (teehee). So who do you call? A ghostbuster, an assbuster, or maybe both?
And how big does your ass have to be to be inhabited by dead spirits? In looking at the credits I see that my girl Katja Kassin is in the picture...Oh, that big...
War of the Girls: Another clever spin on a non-adult production title. This DVD is not to be confused with the Tom Cruise summer-blockbusted (yes, I said that right) War of the Worlds. I sure hope the porn DVD had relatively more success that the mainstream feature.
Semen Demons: It has a nice ring to it, it rolls right off the tongue (I would imagine that that probably is a play on words even though I personally haven’t seen the video), and it’s just fun to say over and over. Besides it’s short and to the point and everyone knows what the theme is about (cumshots) without it being explicitly said. And you sort of get the feeling that the theme is an obsession. Similarly, see Cheek Freaks (where it’s all about the ass).
Short quiz: Can you guess , specifically, the theme or porn niche of the following DVDs based solely on their titles (without searching an online adult DVD retailer site, or googling the phrases, or otherwise cheating :)) ?
Anal Retentive
Mouth 2 Mouth 2
Glazed & Confused 4
Innocence: Perfect Pink
Re-Penetrator
Big Toys No Boys
Last but not least, in terms of new titles we have the soon-to-be-released Black Girls Wanna Cracker, where ebony women play dominant roles to white guys‘ submissive ones. That’s a classic title if there ever was one. Let’s face it, the porn industry has never been nor will ever be known for its political-correctness. And you thought Sierra Has A Negro Problem was bad...
posted by Don_One at 9:37 PM
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