Who Wants to be a Pornstar?

Ron Jeremy was to give a speech in front of the Oxford Union debating society in London last week. Even though he cancelled, the society hopes to get him within the next three months. If he eventually makes the speech, he would join Jenna Jameson as the only other adult performer to have spoken there. I’d love to be a fly on the wall for that speech.

First audience question: “Is it hard doing what you do ?”.(*crowd snigger*)

Jeremy‘s answer: “Well, there’s a lot of ins and outs…” (*crowd giggling*)

Young male admirer: “I just want to say, I’m a big fan of yours and I think you’re doing a bang-up job.” (*audience guffaw*) “Keep it up.” (*snicker*)

In all seriousness, Jeremy is one of the -if not the- top-ranked porn stars of all time, males and females included. Interestingly enough, two of the top three adult performers of all time are men, according to AVN. And this is in a female-driven industry.

That reminds me, I had an idea for an adult-themed reality gameshow, sort of like The Apprentice. It would be called The UpandCummer, and it would air, for obvious reasons, on either HBO, Cinemax, Showtime, Playboy channel, or Spice channel. The contest would be open to men from 18 to 25 who are trying to become the next big male pornstar. Like the next Lex Steele.

Contestants would vie, ultimately, for a studio contract, a free blowjob from a female porn star of their choice, a convertible, and a condo in the San Fernando Valley (where the bulk of porn is filmed, for those who don‘t know). Weekly reward prizes could include getting to eat more pussy in a scene, a hand job from a female co-star, and a photo-shoot for Hustler -or other major- magazine.

The rewards challenges, among others :
1. stamina and endurance- seeing who can hump the longest before becoming tired;
2. length of time needed to make a woman orgasm;
3. seeing who can stay erect the longest amount of time.

The immunity challenges would be 1 all the way up to 6 money shots a day; measuring factors like
1. amount of cum;
2. distance;
3. precision -coming (or should I say “cumming”?) as close as possible to a mark;
4. timing - cumming, as close as possible, on cue.

There would be a female and a male co-host. The male co-host would be a male star who’s been in the industry for a while and who has been a top performer himself. For example, Sean Michaels, Peter North, Randy Spears, or Jonathan Morgan. But, I think the logical choice for male co-host would have to be Jeremy. After all, who’s had more cum shots on camera than Jeremy? He has over 1700 film credits, for goodness sake!